Megadildoes!

Hi, sorry I’ve been incommunicada again. I’m back! But first, a little musical interlude:

Ah, that was lovely. And now, the news of the day…and quite possibly the best news you’ll hear all day it is, too:

Rush Limbaugh, the most prominent political radio host in the United States, said Monday that he is beginning treatment for lung cancer.

Limbaugh, 69, told his radio audience Monday that he was diagnosed with an advanced stage of the disease. He said the diagnosis was confirmed on January 20.

Ach, du liebe Schadenfreude. The biggest fascist enabler in media is finally getting a dose of karma! And you know what that means, eh? Yup, grab your barf bags:

Limbaugh’s radio contract was due to expire later this year. He renewed his deal with the syndication company Premiere Radio Networks in early January.

“Rush is both a colleague and a dear friend, and I know he will handle the situation with courage and grace,” said Rich Bressler, the president of Premiere’s parent company iHeartMedia, in a statement. “I know millions of people nationwide join me and all of iHeart in wishing him a full recovery.”

I know millions more around the world who won’t. But hey, if you’re looking for a media outlet to boycott, there’s one right there. Not least because they’re firing DJs so the owners of the shitshow can give themselves a raise, incidentally.

Meanwhile, here are some sweet, sweet scumbag tears for y’all to bathe in:

Limbaugh’s fans expressed shock about the diagnosis on Monday afternoon.

“Say a prayer today for my fellow talker Rush @limbaugh who just announced he has lung cancer and will be undergoing treatment,” Lars Larson tweeted. “America needs his voice!”

Republican Congressman Mark Meadows tweeted Psalm 46:1 for Limbaugh. “Sending prayers to him, his family, and his show staff for the coming days ahead,” he wrote.

Nah, I think I’ll save those prayers for those in actual need of them. I suspect there are an awful lot of people in the Dominican Republic who will need them much, MUCH more.

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Posted in Crapagandarati, Der Drumpf, Drrrrruuuugs, Fascism Without Swastikas, Filthy Stinking Rich, Isn't It Ironic?, Karma 1, Dogma 0, Not So Compassionate Conservatism, Schadenfreude, Sick Frickin' Bastards, The United States of Amnesia | Comments Off on Megadildoes!

Dumbest conspiracy theory ever?

Quite possibly:

“Nicolás Maduro is implicated in the death of Kobe Bryant up to his eyeballs, because he [Bryant] was planning to recognize Juan Guaidó [as president of Venezuela] and to give him a reception in his home. It had to be said, and I said it.”

“I deleted it because the tweet didn’t accomplish its purpose and was misunderstood. I apologize to my followers.”

Meanwhile, the actual cause of death is the privileged stupidity of attempting to travel by helicopter when all other aircraft, including those of the local police, were grounded by heavy fog and poor visibility.

Meanwhile, Juan Fucking Guaidó is STILL not, in fact, president of anything.

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Posted in Crapagandarati, Fascism Without Swastikas, Good to Know, Huguito Chavecito, Isn't It Ironic?, The Hardcore Stupid, The United States of Amnesia | Comments Off on Dumbest conspiracy theory ever?

Guess who Donnie’s biggest fear is…

Have you guessed it already? If not, let David Doel fill you in:

Lev Parnas’s legal team really deserves a big chef’s kiss for that recording, BTW. Maybe Bernie will give it to them after he wins the primaries. Because this puts the final nails in the “electability” coffins of all the media darlings, including ol’ Uncle Shoe-in-Mouth, Joe Biden.

Donnie also fears socialism, as well he should. Socialism would be THE DEATH OF HIM. Politically and economically, at any rate. Physically? We can only hope.

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Posted in Der Drumpf, Isn't It Ironic?, Mobsters, Schadenfreude, The Bern, The United States of Amnesia | Comments Off on Guess who Donnie’s biggest fear is…

Quotable: John Oliver on “checks and balances”

…or shit and salad bars, if you will:

And by this token, the Repugs are the irresponsible parents, who can’t seem to toilet-train their toddler OR stop him from crapping all over that damn salad bar.

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Posted in Der Drumpf, Merry Old England, Not So Compassionate Conservatism, Quotable Notables, The Hardcore Stupid, The United States of Amnesia | Comments Off on Quotable: John Oliver on “checks and balances”

Music for a Sunday: Don’t bother asking for explanations

And you follow till your sense of direction completely disappears…

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Hillary puts her foot in it (again)

Open mouth wide, insert Ferragamo — Her Royal Clintoness has (mis)spoken. David Doel breaks it all down:

Yeah, that happened. Hillary forgot who busted his ass to help her win the popular vote by a full 3 million votes (only to lose the Electoral College), and lied brazenly about Bernie, who’s been on the right side of history ever since his ass got busted while protesting for civil rights. The chutzpah is unbelievable.

The 2016 election was a shitshow in more ways than one. And it was a battle of the gargantuan egos, too.

And now I’m not at all sure that the more obscenely bloated one took the prize.

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Posted in Crapagandarati, Der Drumpf, Filthy Stinking Rich, Isn't It Ironic?, The Bern, The United States of Amnesia, The WTF? Files | Comments Off on Hillary puts her foot in it (again)

Quotable: Victor Hugo on guillotines

“We may be indifferent to the death penalty, and not declare ourselves either way, so long as we have not seen a guillotine with our own eyes. But when we do, the shock is violent, and we are compelled to choose sides, for or against. Some, like Le Maistre, admire it; others, like Beccaria, execrate it. The guillotine is the law made concrete; it is called the Avenger. It is not neutral and does not permit you to remain neutral. Whoever sees it quakes, mysteriously shaken to the core. All social problems set up their question mark around that blade. The scaffold is vision. The scaffold is not a mere frame, the scaffold is not an inert mechanism made of wood, iron, and ropes. It seems like a creature with some dark origin we cannot fathom, it is as though the framework sees and hears, the mechanism understands, as though the wood and iron and ropes have their own will. In the hideous nightmare it projects across the soul, the awful apparition of the scaffold fuses with its terrible work. The scaffold becomes the accomplice of the executioner; it devours, eats flesh, and drinks blood. The scaffold is a sort of monster created by judge and carpenter, a spectre that seems to live with an unspeakable vitality, drawn from all the death it has wrought.”

–Victor Hugo, Les Misérables

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Posted in Morticia! You Spoke French!, Quotable Notables | Comments Off on Quotable: Victor Hugo on guillotines

In which a gun-hugging bootlicker pwns herself…

…over and over…

…and over again:

You know it’s a sad day for the far right when even the boots have no use for this silly bootlicker.

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Posted in Cops Behaving Better, Crapagandarati, Fascism Without Swastikas, Fine Young Cannibals, Guns, Guns, Guns, Isn't It Ironic?, Schadenfreude, The Hardcore Stupid, The United States of Amnesia | Comments Off on In which a gun-hugging bootlicker pwns herself…

Donnie’s impeachment trial: Oh, it is ON, baby.

And here is the formal handover of the articles of impeachment (only two, alas, out of so many more there could have been, but they’ll have to do):

The real action starts 18 minutes in, if you’re wondering (and don’t have much time to sit through the preamble).

More to come tomorrow. Stay tuned.

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Posted in Der Drumpf, Fascism Without Swastikas, Filthy Stinking Rich, Isn't That Impeachable?, Law-Law Land, The United States of Amnesia | Comments Off on Donnie’s impeachment trial: Oh, it is ON, baby.

Music for a Sunday: A shot of coffee to stimulate

Yes, I know this is late. So listen to it before your morning commute, why don’t you?

I never knew there was a video for this great (and underrated) song. Much less one with so much glorious art-school weirdness about it. But here you go, and now you know.

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